Monday August 27, 2018
Written by DJ Premo, Loaded Box Podcast Co-Host and Blogger
If you are anything like me, labor day marks the beginning of the football season. Thus marks the beginning of five months of ignoring your girlfriend, boyfriend, wives, husbands and kids. It isn’t easy, but I am here to give advice on how to prepare those people close to you for, “Football Season Neglect.”
As I previously mentioned, Labor Day weekend is a huge weekend for me and marks the beginning of “radio silence” from my family. College Football begins and I have four fantasy drafts in three days. Hopefully your league commissioners are smart and do all your drafts on labor day weekend after preseason ends. For those of you that do draft labor day weekend, here is your first piece of advice.
What I do on draft weekend is go back to my hometown and I send my wife and kid up to Northern Wisconsin to our Family Cottage. That way she is in her happy place and not thinking about me. Another advantage to this is that my wife can not call me because she is in a dead zone. Win-Win if you ask me.
Now you are probably asking, “But DJ, I don’t have a cottage up North. What should I do?” Well first you need to make more money and buy one. But that’s not the only solution. All of our significant others have a happy place. Figure out what they like to do. If you don’t have any kids, have your girlfriend do a girls weekend with her friends or buy her a spa day. If you have kids, I would suggest sending the wife and kids to their parents house so that your wife has help and doesn’t completely loathe you.
The following weekend is when football season shifts into overdrive and we all descend into our “Man Caves” like grizzly bears that hunker down for the greatest season of all. Football Season. We may peak our heads up every once in a while for a bite to eat or to say goodnight to the wife/husband, gf/bf and kids… if you have them.
Of course you will see them on your occasional Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday. You have to save face somehow. But that will be between all your fantasy and degenerate gambling preparation. By the way, if you don’t bet on football games you should start. There is nothing more exhilarating than thinking you know everything and then realizing you know nothing as you lose every dollar you earned that week.
Here is my second and last piece of advice. Every now and then invite your family down to watch your favorite team play. When the Packers play on Sunday nights, I have my wife mix up a big, beautiful plate of nachos. Then we watch the game together and she feels like she has spent some quality time with me. We are both happy. I get to eat a delicious meal while staying on her good side and she got to see me on a football night. Works like a charm.
It really is that simple. Just get them involved two or three times a season. If you have kids, have them dress up in your favorite teams gear. Make sure they know you still think of them every now and then.
My whole goal is at the end of the season when I walk up from my man cave out of hibernation, stretch my arms and let out a huge roar… I want my wife and kid to still be there. No chance I realize if they left me until the last whistle blows of the season. To be honest, with how much of a degenerate gambler I am, I will not be surprised if they are no where to be found one day. Just another thing I gamble on… my well-being. Good night and happy gambling.